Burden

Throughout all of high school, I had a backpack on my back. I got used to the feeling. I made sure to check behind my back on my desk to see if I left my backpack when I felt weightless.

In my later years of high school, I heaved around my laptop or books – something – added with the weight of my backpack. I carried these things with me all the time. To the classroom, to the cafeteria, to the restroom, outside, inside – I got used to the feeling.

The feeling of something on me – a burden – was expected. It felt weird without a bag on my back and something in my hands. Sometimes I would start to get out of class but swear I was holding something earlier. I would turn around, and there it was – a book, a laptop, a project, something.

The feeling saved me thousands of time since I get so forgetful, but of course, I didn’t always have something weighing me down.

Which is why I felt empty when I held nothing.

On days of standardized tests, we were asked to leave our belongings back at home or in our tiny lockers – either that or your stuff would be kept in the front office until the end of the school day.

I left behind everything I had at home. I came with nothing to school.

It was a weird feeling – an odd feeling. I had nothing weighing me down. I had nothing in my hands. I had nothing on my back.

I walked faster, moved faster, maneuvered between people easier.

My point is, sometimes, burdens in life are necessary and actually help you. Whatever you do, though, never forget the feeling of freedom without anything weighing you down.

Dream

A young girl, a child, with pale blonde hair and eyes as black as coal runs up to me. Her looks and the black dress remind me of someone, but I push all this aside. This girl takes me somewhere, and suddenly – I stop her.

I have the feeling we’ve been playing together for hours in what seem like minutes.

I ask her a simple question: “Where are we?”

Her crescent smile wanes away, and she no longer looks at me. She turns to the passerby as they walk somewhere far off I cannot see.

“This is a dream,” she responds. Before I can say anything, she adds. “This place is not real. These people are not real.”

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Fall with Grace XD

As my foot hit my backpack I left in my room, I remember time very carefully, very slowly begin to slow.

You’re tripping. You’re tripping, Rocky. Oh my gammit, what do you do? Oh my gammit, my cousin is right – we’re bringing back the “gammit”, I think to myself as I VERY slowly realized I’m falling.

Calm down. Think. Think – what are you always told to do when you fall or trip?

At this thought, I quickly land on my foot and did a small twirl.

Fall with grace or land with dignity.

I don’t move as time catches up to me.

Did I just think that? FALL WITH GRACE OR LAND WITH DIGNITY – when has this ever gone into my mind?